


Go On, I'll Watch

by mforpaul



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Established Relationship, Facials, Fluff, Idiots in Love, M/M, Masturbation, Porn with Feelings, Public Hand Jobs, Smut, Trust, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-13
Updated: 2019-06-06
Packaged: 2020-01-12 22:00:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18455459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mforpaul/pseuds/mforpaul
Summary: This is established relationship Barisi where they love and trust each other very, very much!Chapter 1: Rafael catches Sonny masturbating under the shower.Chapter 2: Rafael wants to watch Sonny playing with himself.Chapter 3: Sonny doesn't let Rafael jack off.Chapter 4: Office facialChapter 5: Semi-public handjob police car situation





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [nevadatrash](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nevadatrash/gifts).



> This is one of those fics that only exists because wonderful people (namely nevadatrash) exchange headcanons with me and while it was supposed to be two one-shots at first other wonderful people (namely mgarner, barbaesparza and soul_writerr) kept suggesting more scenarios and I end up with five chapters about Barisi masturbation life. And I love it! Thank you so much!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rafael catches Sonny playing with himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is what happens when nevadatrash and I start talking about the boys jacking off. My friend, you have the most amazing headcanons. I love discussing with you about the boys so much, it's thrilling and so creative. Thank you very much for this story!
> 
> I'm gonna ramble on about Carisi's dick for a bit. You'll see it includes Kat's headcanon about him being hung, my headcanon about him having the most beautiful dick in the world and [the pink tip of his dick headcanon by sweetcannolicarisi](https://mforpaul.tumblr.com/post/183174618747/i-could-stayed-into-his-eyes-for-hours-also-can).

With a click the door opens. Barba pulls his keys out of the lock and enters his apartment. He immediately hears the sounds of dripping water.

He is late. He knows that. It is well past eleven.

Sharing the same type of job is truly a benefit to his relationship. He appreciates that he has a very understanding boyfriend who had probably put aside half of the dinner that he had cooked for the both of them, while not bothering to wait around for him. Most likely he had digged into that spinach lasagna as soon as Barba had texted him that he would need to work late. Barba imagines a plate covered with another plate to stand in his tepid oven, the homemade food being kept warm so that Barba can eat as soon as he comes home.

The first concern on Barba’s mind though is the man in question.

He throws his keys into a bowl onto the counter that separates the small kitchen from the living room. This very kitchen counter had been used for mail, candy wrapper and tissues in various states of being until the arrival of Carisi in his house. Now there is a bowl and when he is awarded the company of his boyfriend on workday mornings, he is actually having breakfast there.

So there is nothing else that Barba wants to see after a long week and what feels like an even longer day than _him._

Barba puts his phone next to the bowl on the kitchen counter. On the way to the bathroom, he strips off his jacket and shoes.

Carisi had left the door of the bathroom open. Which Barba doesn’t appreciate as the steam of the hot water flows out into his apartment leaving a damp smell.

Barba steps into the doorframe, ready to complain when he sees Carisi in the mirror.

The mirror is placed opposite the shower and the door opposite the mirror.

Barba can easily watch him.

Carisi is leaning with his back against the tile wall. His eyes are closed, his head directed towards the ceiling. Drops of water splash into his angelic face. His graying hair is soaking wet, a certain water drop curls around a stunning strain on his forehead. The tip of his tongue is pressed between his lips.

The water is running out of the shower in an ever ongoing soothing sound. Barba can hear the little moan all the same.

All the while, Carisi’s torso is moving up and down so he understands that his boyfriend is breathing heavily. Carisi’s mouth forms the most wonderful “O” on his tender lips, but Barba cannot be sure if the sound ever leaves his mouth.

Carisi’s long delicate fingers are wrapped around his cock.

Carisi has a beautiful penis. Carisi has the most beautiful penis that Barba has ever seen. Not just that he has a very impressive size, his penis is aesthetically absolutely beautiful. A picturesque vein runs along the length of it. Drawn in the same pale color like the rest of Carisi’s skin, it looks as if it is made out of marble, nearly sculptural. Only the tip, the head of his penis is pink like his lips.

If Barba had any talent in painting or photographing he would throw himself at the picture. The pure aesthetics of the scene are absolutely mind blowing.

But Barba doesn’t, so he instead does his best to burn a mental image of the scene into his brain.

Carisi’s hand only moves slowly, telling Barba that his boyfriend must have just started. It would be easy to just jump under the shower with him. They don’t need condoms anymore, but they don’t have lube there and blowing someone under the shower with the water constantly falling into one’s eyes or mouth sounds hotter than it actual is.

Besides, Barba has a better idea.

* * *

 

_R: I thought about you all day_  
_S: Aw, Rafi!_  
_R: You naked under the shower_  
_S: Less romantic, but alright_  
_R: You look so fucking beautiful with the water on your body_  
_S: I’m blushing_  
_R: Fuck, you know I like that_  
_S: I’m usually thinking about you under the shower_  
_R: Do you play with yourself?_  
_S: I know I shouldn’t do this but sometimes I just miss you_  
_R: You’re such a good boy, cariño, just thinking about this makes me so hard_  
_S: I just do it sometimes_  
_R: I like the thought of you touching yourself_  
_S: Good to hear_  
_R: What is it that you’re thinking?_  
_S: If you’d be there with me_  
_R: What would you do to me?_  
_S: Well, I imagine your body under the water_  
_R: Go on_  
_S: I love your chest hair_  
_R: My dick twitches_  
_S: Oh, I love getting my mouth on your dick_  
_R: You wanna blow me under the shower?_  
_S: And so much more_  
_R: Like what?_  
_S: I’d like to touch you when you’re so wet_  
_R: Touch me where?_  
_S: Maybe finger you_  
_R: Are you coming like this, thinking about me under the shower?_  
_S: I wanna make you come_

Barba is leaning against the wall next to the entrance of Carisi’s apartment building. He is smirking to himself. Quite frankly, he has no experience with dirty texting. He is an old-fashioned guy in some ways. But he just couldn’t resist to make Carisi going beforehand.

He decides that he had whirled up enough heat.

Barba licks his lips when he walks up the five flights of stairs to Carisi’s apartment. The building has no elevator, otherwise he would never succumb to so much unnecessary activity.

Barba had guessed that Carisi would blush about touching himself for many reasons. Embarrassment because it is supposed to be his private moment. Shame out of catholic guilt. And probably mostly guilt because he feels like a bad boyfriend to Barba for doing this.

But Barba doesn’t mind. The contrary. Carisi deserves this, deserves these moments of pleasure with himself.

Maybe this is why the image of his boyfriend under the shower had been on top of his mind for the past two weeks. He had thought about this at work, jerking off alone under his own shower and when they had sex.

He knows that Carisi wouldn’t be angry, but Barba knows he shouldn’t have seen this.

Moreover, he shouldn’t replay the scene in his mind over and over again. He should have gone back to his spinach lasagna that evening like he had with the difference of pushing that image out of his mind, never thinking about it again. Leaving this private moment to his boyfriend.

This makes this so thrilling.

He shouldn’t have.

Standing in front of Carisi’s apartment door, Barba takes one last breath and hits the key into the lock. He turns and with a click the door opens.

Something inside of Carisi’s apartment is knocked down with a muffled thud. A curse is whispered followed by a shy question.

“Rafi?”

Barba slips inside, he closes the door behind him and makes sure to shut the security lock, too.

One might think a detective/lawyer living in Brooklyn might actually care about locking the security locks and Barba might never understand the logic behind Carisi’s carelessness in that matter. But then again, the man is approaching forty in fast steps and still lives like a student in a shoebox of an apartment that includes entrance, bedroom, kitchen and closet in one room.

Barba has his eyes fixed on Carisi. He is wearing a simple white t-shirt. As it is well past eleven he is lying on his bed ready to sleep.

But Barba hadn’t missed how Carisi had hurriedly pulled up his boxer briefs.

“Rafi, what are you doing here so late?”

Barba only smirks in response. He throws his keys into a bowl on the couch table. The bowl matches the one he has in color and pattern. He takes off his jacket and slowly also his shoes and pants.

By holding eye contact with Carisi he makes sure that his boyfriend knows what he is doing while he cannot actually stare properly at him stripping.

“Isn’t it obvious?”

“Uh?”

It is so adorable how shy Carisi still is about tackling taboos, even after coming to terms with his sexuality and openly being with a man. And Barba knows that Carisi is not shy about sex. No, Carisi is more than happy experimenting with the ideas that Barba is planting into his head.

“Get naked!”

Barba is still undoing the buttons of his shirt when Carisi, ever eager to oblige, is already naked.

“You want me to fuck you?”

Carisi closes the few steps across the room to Barba. His cheeks are already (or still) flushed, but Barba stops him with a raised index finger.

“No.”

“What?”

“You keep doing what you did before I arrived. Go on, I’ll watch.”

Carisi clears his throat and smiles somewhat sheepishly. He is not being timid, Carisi knows what Barba means and he won’t try to deny it. Nevertheless, he is clearly irritated when Barba, having stopped taking off his clothes and therefore still wearing his boxers and an unbuttoned shirt, just sits down in an old armchair right across Carisi’s bed.

“But, Rafi…?”

Carisi turns his palm towards the ceiling in a helpless manner. Barba only raises an eyebrow. His heart is thrumming as if he had just run a marathon.

Because of the _thrill._

The thrill that his plan has worked out so easily, that a few dirty texts late at night had been enough to make Carisi touch himself. That Barba had caught him in the right moment.

Barba had loved to walk in on him.

“But what?”

And Barba knows that Carisi loves it, too. Carisi loves being shy and playing coy around him, but nothing about this man is shy or coy. Every time they have sex Carisi acts as if he is more excited about it than the day before. And he knows what kind of effect this attitude has on Barba.

“You know…”

Naked Carisi shrugging his shoulder while the crimson blush had already spread over his pale chest is one of the most beautiful images Barba can think of.

“I want to watch you.”

After all that is what Carisi wants.

“But it’s silly.”

For Barba to make him blush.

“What is silly?”

Barba takes a good look at Carisi’s dick, happy to see him already (and still) half hard.

He wets his lips.

“We’re together, we can just… you know, _fuck.”_

Barba decides to make it easier for Carisi. He puts one elbow on the armchair. The nail of his thumb brushes against his slightly parted lips. Barba gazes into Carisi’s intense blue eyes and pushes his hip forward.

“You don’t have to be embarrassed about playing with yourself. I wanna see it.”

Barba in turn is already fully hard. And he has no illusion about the outlines of his erection through the thin fabric of his boxers.

“Rafi, I just… because you turned me on. Now you’re here and I-“

“You don’t want me to watch you?”

Barba can see the moment Carisi’s eyes darken with lust.

He bites into his lips.

Carisi takes one last look at Barba’s crotch before he walks over to his bed, settling down into a comfortable position.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another story that happened even though I had so many other things to write, but I couldn't get anything done and the smut came easy to me.
> 
> I just hope you enjoy, if you did please leave comments and kudos! And follow me on Twitter or Tumblr @mforpaul.
> 
> Second chapter includes the real smut of course, but as I am travelling it won't be up until after Easter!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rafael watches Carisi jerk off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Big thanks again to nevadatrash for our wonderful conversations. I appreciate this so much!
> 
> And thanks to unitedkatesofamerica for letting me help her with statistics. You ruined the line about Sonny's dick getting significantly harder for me.

“I don’t know what to do, to be honest.”

“Just do what you always do.”

“I usually just think about you and jack off.”

Carisi sits on the rim of his bed, his torso bent slightly forward and has his hand loosely wrapped around his shaft.

He shrugs his shoulders. His expression tells Barba that he is obviously torn between arousal and feeling a little stupid about what he is about to do.

“Do you always think about me?”

Now Carisi rolls his eyes.

“Please, let’s not go down that road, Rafael.”

Barba knows by now that when Carisi uses his full first name instead of his usual use of the embarrassing and at the same time very sweet diminutive of “Rafi”, his boyfriend is serious. Carisi will insist on not discussing all of his masturbation fantasies.

Which is alright really. Barba has no illusion about himself being everything Carisi dreams about. That is just unrealistic.

Carisi might think about breasts or having sex in court or whatever. Things he can't have. Barba can’t blame him. It’s his head, his fantasy. He settles for the fact that Carisi seems to think about him at least sometimes.

“Think about me now.”

Barba shifts in the armchair. He pushes his hips forward so that his semi-erection is outlined clearly through his underwear. Carisi indeed spares a quick look there, swallowing hard.

“I’m usually really just jerking off.”

Barba spreads his legs a little more. His arm is angled leaning against the headboard of the armchair. His thumb gently pushes against his lips. Barba knows that his look with the unbuttoned shirt is exactly what Carisi likes.

But quite frankly, Barba doesn’t think he is the one worth being looked at here.

“You looking so fucking good like this.”

Carisi nearly chokes. He had been staring at Barba’s chest hair and is obviously caught off guard by the sudden compliment.

“You’re so fucking sexy when you’re naked, Sonny.”

Honestly, Barba can barely think of anything more erotic than Sonny Carisi’s body. No matter how much he tries to stage his own self and no matter how much red he manages to put into Carisi’s cheeks, Barba would never be close to being as desirable as Carisi is.

“I love your body.”

Barba is pleased to see that his simple words had made Carisi significantly harder.

“This is why I want to watch you, Sonny.”

Barba had lowered his voice to a whisper. He uses the same tone of voice as when he is huffing dirty talk in Spanish into his lover’s ear, knowing about the shiver that he sends down Carisi’s spine.

“There’s nothing more beautiful in this world than watching you come, Sonny. So I want to see you. I want to see your full beauty.”

Sonny Carisi is a piece of art.

Barba had never said so out loud, but this is what he is convinced of.

“Come on, touch yourself. Touch yourself for me.”

Carisi swallows hard, but he obeys. He tightens the grip around his sex and starts playing with himself.

“Yeah, cariño, that’s it.”

Barba feels the goosebumps spreading over his skin when he watches Carisi’s hand jerking up and down.

Carisi’s dick is fully hard soon.

His penis looks incredibly strong being fully erected and Barba lets out a muffled moan at the thought of having that big dick inside of him.

Carisi works his hand around his cock in a fast pace. Barba can see the vein along his shaft popping out more against the impressive erection. If possible, the vein, the throbbing erection, the fast working hand, it all makes Carisi look extraordinarily attractive.

Barba thinks about what it would look like if Carisi played with his balls as well. Or, god forbid, if he fingered himself.

“Do you touch yourself anywhere else?”

“Uh, no?” Carisi loses his rhythm for a moment when he answers Barba. “Do you want me to?”

Barba smiles and gently bites into the nail of his thumb. He slowly shakes his head.

If that makes any sense, Barba is totally in love with how stubborn and at the same time eager to please this man can be. While Barba loves giving him instructions, because Carisi does very well with clear instructions, he loves it even more when Carisi takes control.

Carisi should know this by now. But obviously today isn’t the day that Carisi is going to have his brazen moment.

“You can touch me.”

Even if Carisi tried to go for an instruction or a suggestion at least, the sentence is clearly a question.

Barba shakes his head again.

Not today.

“Go on, I’ll watch.”

“Okay.”

Barba watches as Carisi’s wrists jerks a little faster around his cock.

The blush of Carisi’s face had spread all the way down to his stomach where the heated skin touches the paleness of Carisi’s abs.

 _Gosh,_ this man is beautiful. And he lets out the most beautiful moans. Beautiful moans that leave Carisi’s delicately pink lips.

Barba watches in delight that Carisi is trying hard to keep his eyes open. Trying hard to look at Barba.

His blue eyes had become watery.

The intensity of Carisi’s eyes shoots right into Barba’s dick.

“You’re doing so well, cariño.”

“Rafael.”

“You think about me, don’t you? You think about what I like to do to you.”

Barba would like to know about all those fantasies that go through his boyfriend’s head right now, but he knows that it would distract Carisi talking about it and Barba wants him in no way to stop touching himself.

“You think about how I stroke along your thighs?”

There is nothing else that Barba would like to do in that moment.

“How I take your balls into my mouth?”

It takes a lot of willpower to not get up and do exactly just that.

“How I tease your dick?”

Carisi’s strong hand working over his impressive size literally blows Barba’s mind away. He feels his dick twitching, but Barba wants to relish the image of his boyfriend jerking off for him to the fullest. 

“God, how I love your dick, Sonny. You don’t know how much I love your dick!”

Barba slightly bites into the nail of his thumb. That dick filling him up is the best fucking feeling in the world.

“Rafael, I-.”

“You’re doing so well, cariño. You look so good.”

A strain of gray hair falls into Carisi’s forehead. His face had basically turned crimson. And his hand moves very fast over his dick.

“Rafael, I’m so close.”

Barba decides that Carisi deserves to be rewarded. Rewarded for looking so fucking beautiful while jerking off. Rewarded for being so wonderful.

“I have never seen something this sexy.”

Barba gets up from the armchair and crosses the few steps towards the bed only to knee in front of Carisi.

“My own private show.”

“Oh my god, Rafael!”

Carisi moans at the sight of Barba kneeling in front of him and by the way his boyfriend turns his head skywards Barba understands that Carisi is about to come.

“No, look at me.”

A wince is all that Carisi manages as a response when he looks back down to Barba.

Barba’s heart pounds madly in his chest. His lips start trembling in anticipation.

“I want you to come on my face.”

_“Oh!”_

Carisi pants and pumps into his fist like crazy.

“Come on, you deserve this.”

And Carisi comes.

He lets out a deep groan. Barba feels streaks of come splashing over his chin, his lips, his cheeks.

Barba smirks at the incredible look on his boyfriend’s face. The expression says more “I can’t believe this is happening” than the actual words would.

Carisi’s cum feels wonderfully warm on his face and he just loves how Carisi keeps pumping into his fist until he spends the last drop of his semen on Barba.

“Oh. My. Fucking. God.”

“That’s blasphemy, Sonny.”

Barba’s voice sounds calm, he knows it, but his own erection is itching terribly in his boxers.

“Rafi, I can’t believe you.”

“No, I can’t believe you. You look so sexy when you play with yourself.”

Carisi with his softening cock in his hand and some sperm dripping from his fingers leans forward to kiss Barba.

He misses Barba’s lips by far due to his poor angle and his attempt to not touch any of his sperm on his lover’s face, but Barba feels and appreciates the sentiment of the gesture.

“You look so fucking sexy. I was kinda confused when you suddenly came in. I really didn’t think this would be so…”

“Sonny, before you start saying ‘awesome’ three thousand times would you mind taking care of my little problem here?”

Barba looks down to his crotch. Admittedly, his knees ache a little there on the laminate flooring so he is more than happy when Carisi says simply:

“Lay down on the bed.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone for reading but please don't forget to leave kudos and a comment. You would make me so happy.
> 
> As you saw this has suddenly three chapters. I want to say three things about this: First, this is Bianca's fault. Second, see, Kat, people want multichaptered from me! Three, the idea for Chapter 3 is perfect! I talked about B's idea to Kat and Rahel and they just agreed. It's so Barisi and I'm really excited about it. It will be up in a week!
> 
> See you then and love loud!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happens when Rafael jerks off?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is solely Bianca's fault (not that I need much convincing) with her comment on the last chapter. I showed her idea to Kat and she was like "of course, Maxi, that's so Sonny. Why didn't you come up with that idea?" So here we go.

Once again, the image of these fine pants tightening so nicely around this gorgeous tushy cajoles into Barba's mind. The gun in its holster hanging on the belt around his hips. The vest fitting perfectly around his slim torso, underlining his tall figure. The sleeves of his shirt rolled up exposing muscular forearms.

Barba sighs. This is not the first time that these very vivid memories of one hour ago distract him from his work.

What can he do? He's only human. His boyfriend had looked so fucking sexy.

Even though they are working together, Barba doesn't have the chance to see his boyfriend in detective mode very often. Maybe in the precinct sitting boringly at his desk, but not in field detective mode where he needs to arrest perps and run after… Barba should stop thinking about this.

He rubs a hand over his face. This evening doesn't go the way he wants to at all. With an empty gaze he stares at his laptop in front of him.

Not just that Carmen is sick so Barba seriously has to do something as disgraceful as looking up precedents by himself, his boyfriend had come home absolutely exhausted after an early shift plus pulling overtime on top of it as SVU had caught a new case. Carisi had went straight to bed.

So this is how they spend their Saturday evening: Barba doing home office and Carisi sleeping.

And these images of his boyfriend with loose hair, an intense expression on his face and the badge attached to his waist…

Barba sighs. He just needs to look at the situation rationally: There is no way that Barba would be able to finish this scutwork if he'd need to go over the mental picture of his man's body over and over again.

The easiest solution to this is to just jerk off, release the desire.

What can he do? He is only human. Carisi had already looked so good waking up in the morning, but they hadn't been able to fuck as it had been so early.

His boyfriend had felt immensely sorry needing to put Barba off until the evening only to feel even more sorry then when he had been too tired to even stand on his two feet.

But it is what it is. They both know the stress and pressure of their work.

Actually, and Barba would never admit so out loud, he finds it very cute that Carisi comes home to him anyway only to sleep instead of going to his own place.

A smile flashes through Barba's face when he unceremoniously pushes his hips forward on the wooden chair and undoes his zipper.

He had also had a long day. He hadn't even peeled himself out of his suit yet. He had told himself that he wouldn't get comfortable until he had looked up every single one of those darn precedents.

With a small sigh Barba reaches into his fly to his already half-hard dick and again recalls the images of his hot mess of a boyfriend.

His salt and pepper hair had lost the battle against the hair product completely, falling all over his giselled forehead. His eyebrows had been drawn together still contemplating about the case he had just left behind. Looking so strong and confident and powerful.

Barba's whole body shivers along with a prickle that flashes underneath his skin. In joyful anticipation he wraps his hand around his dick that grows fully hard after a few strokes. Barba is not in the mood for any finesse, simple jacking off will do the trick for tonight.

In the back of his mind he hears a rustling sound from the bedroom. Barba steals a glance sidewards to the ajar bedroom door. He doesn't really think Carisi will get up again tonight, no matter how much he had promised to pleasure him. Carisi needs to rest.

Then again, what if he hears him? Barba has found a very understanding and tolerant boyfriend in Carisi, but still he is sure that his man wouldn't appreciate him masturbating when he could have the real deal.

Barba thinks about Carisi's angelic face with those rosy lips and those blue eyes. _Oh those eyes_! This shade of blue should be illegal, for sure it has driven Barba crazy from day one. His wrists works faster around his dick at the thought.

 _So what?_ , Barba thinks. In the unlikely event that Carisi will wake up, he can _watch._

Barba stops jerking for a second and pushes his dress pants further down. He just cannot take the risk to ruin them.

Then he puts his head back and starts twisting his wrist again.

 _Yes._ This is what he needs.

Barba had never been very creative with masturbation fantasies. All his life, he had preferred to put his fantasies into reality. But sex with Sonny Carisi is a different caliber.

Since they are together his stream of thoughts during masturbation, and Barba is embarrassed by his own cheesiness, revolves solely around a certain blue eyed detective. His lover, his partner.

So also now Barba tries to imagine Carisi interrogating witnesses in the field, showing his badge, doing his little act of pretending to bond with a perp to get information. Carisi can have a temper which is absolutely useless when it comes to bringing cases to court but that Barba loves for all the wrong reasons.

Barba licks his lips thinking about the heated temperament that puts a nice crimson into his boyfriend's soft features.

If he'd ever needed to go into field along with Carisi he is very sure that he would just whisper into his ears: “Carisi. You, me. The next bathroom. In two minutes.” Carisi would fuck the hell out of him.

Barba accelerates his strokes.

In the beginning of their relationship Carisi had been so eager to taste his dick at every opportunity. One time even in Forlini's bathroom. They had used to have sex at least twice every day. Barba had cursed and loved his young lover at the same time.

Barba feels the heat in his crotch expanding and knows that he is close. He had been really horny today. There is something about this man that makes Barba just…

“I'm sorry, I can't do this.”

Surprised, Barba tears his eyes open. Carisi is already next to him.

“Rafi, you look hot and everything, but I cannot let you do this alone.”

From the poor angle beside him, Carisi leans down and takes the tip of Barba's dick between his lips.

“I thought you were asleep.”

Carisi lets go of Barba's dick again and looks up.

“Just a nap. Besides you can always call me for that.”

Carisi puts a bottle of lube on the table, next to Barba's notepad and before Barba can even ask when he had gotten this bottle his dick is in Carisi's mouth again.

Barba's eyes water. Admittedly, this feels much better than his own hands.

“Fuck, Sonny!”

With an obscene sound, Carisi pulls away. A mixture of spit and precum connects his dick with his boyfriend's rosey lips.

Carisi gestures him to pull the chair away from the table.

“Get up, let me fuck you.”

Barba still needs to smile at how polite Carisi can be during hot moments.

But without any complaints he stands up and starts unbuttoning his shirt.

“No, leave that on.”

Carisi reaches out for Barba's wrist to stop him from getting naked. Carisi only sleeps in boxers anyway and those are taken off in a heartbeat, exposing his own impressive erection.

He turns Barba around insistently and Barba bends forward almost by reflex.

Carisi leans over his shoulder from behind, Barba can feel the heat radiating from him. He doesn't know how long he had watched but judging from Carisi's heavy breaths his boyfriend is very aroused.

“You asked me about my fantasy.”

Barba feels Carisi's hot breath against his ear.

“This is one.”

Barba hears the bottle of lube plopping open.

“Fucking you at work.”

Slick fingers slide between his cheeks.

“You're so fucking sexy in your suits.”

Barba moans at the pressure of two fingers pushing inside of him.

“You always look so composed.”

Carisi works Barba open only to the minimum that his body needs, obviously too impatient to keep his dick out of Barba's ass.

“But you're always bitching around, so snarky. Always giving people shit.”

Barba feels his dress shirt being pushed up. A palm spreads across his lower back, steadying him.

“I wanna fuck that arrogant expression right out of your face.”

In one smooth motion, Carisi pushes inside. Barba groans shamelessly. Carisi has a big dick and it fills him up nicely.

“Until you can't smirk no more.”

Barba rolls his hips back against Carisi to feel his lover to the fullest.

“Right there in your office.”

And while Carisi thrusts into him, Barba makes the plan in the back of his mind to arrange exactly that.

“Deep, mi amor, deep.”

Carisi wraps one hand around Barba's shoulder and angles his hips so that he can push into him as deeply as possible.

“Yeah.”

It would need to be a day where Carisi has a late shift. Barba would work late, too, until Carmen and everyone else in the DA's office would be gone. It wouldn't be hard to find a reason to make Det. Carisi come to his office.

“Harder.”

Carisi tightens the grip around Barba's hip and Barba closes his eyes, tilting his head skywards to concentrate completely on the feeling.

“Fuck me harder.”

They hadn't really explored rough sex yet. Not because Carisi didn't like it, but because they simply hadn't come to this particular fantasy yet.

“Don't go easy on me, cariño. Fuck me, fuck me real good.”

Oh no, Barba is sure Carisi likes it rough. There is so much eagerness and passion under that puppy face that Barba could blush at the simple thought of all the filth buried underneath.

“Show me, show me how you'd fuck me into my desk.”

Carisi is full of passion.

And right now he fucks into Barba deep and hard. Exactly in the right angle to penetrate a certain bundle of nerves with every thrust.

The sounds of skin hitting against each other fills the room. Carisi moans loudly and Barba knows his lover's whole skin is covered in a heated blush.

Barba comes before he knows what is happening to him. He lets out a filthy stream of Spanish curses when he squirts his cum all over his notebook.

These fucking precedents.

Red dots blurry his visions, there is a beeping sound in his ear. With Carisi he is never afraid of the disorientation after an orgasm as these strong hands still hold his hips steady.

“Oh fuck, Rafi! Did you like that? This was so good.”

All of the sudden Carisi pulls out. A second later Barba feels warm streaks of cum splashing over the cheeks of his ass.

Barba bites his lips contentedly. He fucking loves to be dirty.

He feels a sting on his ass when Carisi unexpectedly slaps right across his cheeks.

“Your ass is fucking devine.”

“I hope you didn't ruin the shirt.”

“No.” Carisi pants behind him, obviously not able to give any more verbal confirmation so shortly after his climax.

“Where's the logic in keeping on my clothes when you wanna come on me anyway?”

Carisi chuckles and Barba feels that the sperm is wiped away from his ass.

“Didn't think through.”

Barba turns around to see that Carisi had used his own boxers to clean him up. What a gentleman.

Barba shakes his head but smiles.

He still feels dizzy so he leans back against the table and throws his arms around the neck of his naked boyfriend.

“I love you, Sonny.”

“I love you, too.”

With a big grin on his face Carisi ducks his head and presses an even bigger smooch on Barba's lips.

“But I still can't believe you jerked off while I was _in the next room_.”

“I didn't want to bother you.”

“Bother me? With your dick?”

Barba smiles and enjoys the warmth that flows through his body while their foreheads are pressed together.

“You were so tired. I thought you were asleep for the night.”

“There are more important things than sleep.”

“Like my dick?”

“Yes!” Carisi kisses him again. “Just for the future, I want you to call me for these kind of problems of yours.”

“Sonny, there's nothing wrong with me jacking off for once. Trust me I haven't done that in quite a while.”

“Because that's my business!” Carisi's voice has a tone of insistence to it that would usually make Barba keep teasing him, but for tonight he is tired and still has work to do. “Don't ever deprive me of the chance to take care of you again.”

“Sometimes I can't believe you.”

“Promise me.”

“I promise.”

Barba still has his arms wrapped around Carisi's neck and puts a hand at the back of his head to pull him down for a kiss. Secretly, he wishes to be naked, too, so he could feel his warm skin

“You go back to sleep, I'm afraid I'll still have work to do today.”

“Yeah, I think your notes are ruined though.”

“I know, I aimed for them instead of the table.”

Carisi lets out a ringing laughter and moves his lips to Barba's ear. “Then come with me to bed.”

“I can't. You know we're in Staten Island tomorrow, I won't have time.”

“Come on, I came here tonight so we should go to bed together.”

Carisi peppers his face with kisses when the realization comes to Barba's mind. That had been his plan all along. To have a nap before fucking him only to lure him into bed to abuse him as a cuddling pillow.

“I guess those precedents can wait until tomorrow.”

What can he do? He is clearly a weak man.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some gay smut is the perfect way to welcome Ramadan which starts tonight (no irony intended), so blessed Ramadan to everyone who's fasting or not fasting.
> 
> Please don't forget to leave kudos and comments, they make my writer's heart beat. Thanks to everyone who's reading, you make me so happy. And don't forget to check out the new chapter of [Smitten](https://archiveofourown.org/works/17442977/chapters/41069927).
> 
> My biggest thanks to nevadatrash for discussing my stories with me <3


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The office sex

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter goes to mgarner1227, nevadatrash, barbaesparza, soul_writerr and soundwithinsilence who bought me my first Ko-Fi :) I love you all!

With squared shoulders and a pointed non-smile on his face Barba enters his office. Lieutenant Benson and Sergeant Tutuola are following him but none of the two cops can match Barba's firm step. It's a step of victory. With a raised chin and maybe even peppered with a little hop.

Nevertheless, the pride in his chest and the relief in his stomach cannot hide the fact that he's tired to his bones.

Barba knows he had succeeded. He did it. He knows he had made up for lack of evidence with legal prowess.

With a vigorous swirl Barba turns around behind his desk to face Liv and Fin and looks up to them with a face of nonchalance as if nothing special had happened.

Fin is the one who gives him the compliment he doesn't admit he wants.

"Counselor, you nailed it."

"I can't believe we're offering a child molester a deal."

Barba sends Liv a withering look. He can't believe how unthankful she is sometimes. SVU had given him nothing.

"Without this deal, he might get acquitted."

"How much are you gonna offer him?" Fin asks.

"We're talking two digits, I hope to make the first one a two."

"You can make him agree to twenty years?" Liv asks surprised.

Now it's Barba's turn to raise a confident eyebrow and rummage around on his desk with no aim other than looking busy.

It had been his idea to bring up the precedent. The precedent that had made the perp nervous on the witness stand. That had made him forget watching his tongue.

The jury had cried out and the defense attorney had screamed "recess" only to come trotting to him a second later to generously consider negotiating a plea deal.

"He's gonna face life if convicted, I'm sure he'll like to consider his chances of spending his retirement in freedom."

Liv looks at him for a while before she nods appreciatively and a smile reaches her face. "You nailed it, Rafa."

A little smirk appears on Fin's lips and Barba bites back his own.

"Anyway, I'd love to use the moment of shock I created and prepare this plea deal right now. I don't want to lose time. Rita might use it to reconsider."

Barba is very pleased with himself, but the thought of spending another hour of his already draining day with the horrors that had been done to these children sucks all the energy out of him.

But he needs to be strong. As always. No matter how exhausted he is.

Still standing behind his desk he pats his belly that is empty of course and he lets out a big sigh.

He catches Liv and Fin exchanging a short glance. Liv congratulates him again and finds a few motivating words while Fin already walks out of Barba’s office with his phone on his ear to call, so Barba guesses, the only person who can cheer him up.

* * *

Carisi shyly knocks on the door about half an hour later. In his hand he holds a bag that includes his favorite food, Thai from that little hole in the wall a few blocks down, and his pretty eyes shine with a heartwarming smile.

Barba feels his own face soften into an absolutely ridiculous smile.

Actually, Barba only pretends that Thai is his favorite food. Truly, it is Italian. But he cannot risk spoiling his boyfriend too much.

"I thought I could prepare that plea deal for you while you eat."

Carisi takes a chair from the round table for meetings and places it right next to Barba's office chair to sit as close to him as possible.

"We can't take no more risks with that case. The plea deal needs to be neat."

Barba lets everything happen to him. The shoulder that friendlily bumps his, the food that is placed in front of him and the affection he's showered in.

"You know I graduated law, too, right?"

"I have alerted the Bar Association, yes."

"Ha ha. You know I also learned from the best."

"Mmm. That may convince me."

"Mmm?" Carisi repeats and moves his face close to Barba's, placing a wet kiss along with a bright smile onto his lips.

The warmth that blooms through his body already makes Barba feel less miserable. But as if that is not enough Carisi keeps kissing him. He again presses his lips onto Barba’s, but this time Carisi lingers. Their lips move perfectly against each other in sync, until the tip of Carisi’s tongue gently touches Barba’s bottom lip. Barba parts his lip and their tongues meet.

Even at his age and after a couple of years together Barba cannot help the butterflies in his stomach upon being kissed like this. By him.

A strong arm reaches around his shoulder to hold him tight.

“You did really amazing”, Carisi whispers against his lips.

“I would enjoy that compliment more if you weren’t so in love with me.”

Carisi chuckles bashfully, but slightly shakes his head. “I admired you long before I loved you.”

“So I’d enjoy that compliment more if you wouldn’t hero-worship me.”

“I’m serious, Rafi, coming up with that ’97 precedent was just brilliant. Rita couldn’t shut it down, but you knew it’d intrigue the judge and the jury was fuming… It was so brilliant. Such a simple move, but so much effect.”

“It was a tell.”

“Rafi, you basically won that case on your own.”

Barba smiles at his boyfriend’s pink cheeks. “Keep talking, someone around here should tell me how great I am.”

Carisi just kisses him again, deep and meaningful, and Barba has no chance but to melt against the touch.

When he breaks the kiss, Carisi licks over his lips: “But you know what the best thing was?”

“What?”

“As I watched you from behind, I could stare at your ass the whole time.”

Now it’s Barba’s turn to chuckle. Admittedly, it feels too good to be worshipped by an attractive lover who is ten years younger than him.

“I’m not just wit.”

“And you look so damn sexy in that suit, do you know that?”

Carisi strokes with his palm over the fine tartan pattern of Barba’s caramel colored suit and stares down the two open buttons of his chartreuse shirt. It needs all of Barba’s self-control to not groan under the desiring stare.

“Sonny, I really need to finish that as soon as possible.”

Carisi gazes into Barba’s eyes and bites his lips. He nods, but he crashes their lips together all the same. This time the kiss is a dangerous one, one that makes Barba’s dick twitch and probably has a similar effect on Carisi.

His boyfriend breaks the kiss soon enough though. Carisi strokes over his coif, as if that has any effect and with one last nod, he grabs for the documents about the present case and gestures Barba to have his dinner.

"But don't gobble, it's not good for your reflux."

So Barba lets him prepare the plea deal. He also lets his stomach be filled up with the spicy food that is also not good for his reflux.

All the while he watches a strain of silver hair fall onto Carisi's forehead, his long fingers wrap around the pen and the tip of his tongue pressed between his lips.

It's only natural that the memory of one of his lover's fantasies comes back to him.

* * *

"As your former mentor I have to say, I'm very pleased."

Laying the finished plea deal on the table, Carisi raises an amused eyebrow and sends Barba a smile that is overall too charming to not make his heart skip a beat.

"Are you now, counselor?"

"As counselor I have to say, you look very sexy, detective."

Carisi blushes immediately and Barba thinks his heart would stop at the sight of it.

"And as boyfriend I have to say, I'm not pleased enough."

"What?"

Of course, Carisi's face turns into worry on the spot and Barba's licks his lips in anticipation.

Barba leans forward, getting closer until their faces are only inches apart but he doesn't kiss him. Instead he stares into Carisi's intense blue eyes until his boyfriend swallows hard.

The next two words Barba says in a low, firm voice.

"Get up."

Carisi obeys without any moment of surprise. He gets up from his chair coming to stand on two shaky feet in front of Barba who is still sitting in his office chair.

His lips are slightly parted while he watches in awe how Barba undoes his belt. Painfully slowly Barba opens the button, then the zipper and then grabs into Carisi’s boxers to pull out his cock.

Barba looks up to Carisi. He knows how to look at him to drive him thoroughly crazy and he is pleased to see his boyfriend’s eyes darken.

Barba licks over his lips. He has his lover’s dick in a loose grip in his left hand and keeps staring at Carisi as if he is waiting for him to get hard just from looking into his eyes.

And truly, Carisi is wincing. Barba knows him by now, after getting past the initiate phase of being overly eager to please Carisi had found out that playing along Barba’s games gives them both a whole different kind of thrill. This is why Carisi doesn’t just ask for him to suck his dick which is what he wants, naturally. No, he’s stubborn. He’ll hold on as long as he can.

“Wasn’t that your fantasy?”

“What?”

“You wanted to do me in my office?”

“Oh fuck, Rafael, you’re serious? What if someone hears us?”

“What if?”

Barba raises a brow. He still has his boyfriend’s dick in his hand and is content that he feels him slowly growing hard.

“Fuck!”

Barba can see the pearl of sweat forming on Carisi’s forehead. His angelic face slowly takes on a shade of dark red from arousal. That’s the look Barba likes on him. When the passion inside of him meets the beauty on his face.

“Do you have lube here?”

Barba wishes he had. But this is spontaneous and they need to go with what they got. So he gives Carisi’s dick a few lazy strokes, it’s enough to make him fully erected. Barba doesn’t need to notice the shiver in his boyfriend’s body to suspect him to be extremely aroused already. Carisi has a tendency to not be able to hold back when he’s too excited.

And sex in the DA’s office is obviously exciting.

Unceremoniously, Barba closes his lips around the pink tip of Carisi’s dick. His lover sucks in a sharp breath. Anyway, Barba teases him only enough to feel the salty taste of precum on his tongue.

Then he lets go. Not breaking the eye contact Barba licks over the length of Carisi’s dick a couple of times. After that Barba stands up from his office chair and indicates Carisi to sit down there instead of him.

It’s exhilarating for Barba to see how the whole situation stirs Carisi up, even with as little blowing as that. His boyfriend bites into his bottom lip so hard that it turns white where his teeth push into the soft flesh. His hands hover adorably in the air as he obviously tries to hold himself back from pulling Barba’s hair.

He wants to enjoy the situation but is afraid to be too loud. _How cute_.

 _That should be easy_ , Barba thinks. _Let’s see how far we can push the situation_.

As soon as Barba kneels down, Carisi’s jaw drops. Barba tries to hide his smirk. _Yes,_ ADA Rafael Barba is kneeling down in front of Detective Carisi.

“Don’t you dare”, he warns him anyway.

He cannot even count the reasons why Carisi is rightfully astound. Besides his dress pants being too expensive for this, his knees are too old for the hard floor. Not that he had ever liked any kneeling in front of any guy ever.

“You looked so fucking sexy the other day. Let me watch you again.”

Barba sparkles at Carisi out of his viridian eyes. Carisi however looks taken aback for a second, he had obviously expected one of Barba’s prominent beejays. But Barba just ducks his head and starts kissing the inside of Carisi’s thighs gently.

“Rafi, just suck me off. We shouldn’t make it long, I’m afraid someone’s still here.”

Without any reply Barba sticks out his tongue and explores the inside of Carisi’s thighs like this.

“Oh, ah!”

The whispered moans that escape his lover’s lips are a pure delight. Barba knows his lover to be sensitive and very receptive when his body is worshipped. Nevertheless, he had never received a reaction like this from caressing his thighs before.

“You look so hot when you play with yourself, Sonny. Come on, touch yourself.”

Barba looks up to him as innocently as he can manage while he strokes his cheeks along the sensitive skin of Carisi’s inner thighs.

“You can finish off on the ADA’s face.”

Carisi just tilts his head and wordlessly wraps his fingers around his dick. With firm strokes he starts working around his dick in sudden enthusiasm.

“You’re such a slut, Raf, seriously.”

Barba only smirks. He hasn’t found out yet, if Carisi is slightly offended by that or actually likes it. He suspects a combination of both. The latter being the case in situations like these.

One way or the other, Barba gently bites into the soft flesh of his boyfriend’s thigh. Carisi curses in response and accelerates his strokes. With his left hand he pulls clumsily at his tie, the urge to release some of his heat from inside suddenly overcoming him.

Barba feels pure want flushing through his body. Carisi is the perfect mess. His usual composed appearance (he had learned from the best after all) falling apart with loose hair, a tie out of place and his angelic face convulsed in arousal.

He’d do anything for that man, especially when he looks like this.

Barba shifts his weight to get a better look at Carisi’s impressive erection that his boyfriend works with vigor.

Barba wonders how far they could take it tonight.

Carisi pushes his hips a little forward and spreads his legs more to get into a comfortable position. Barba bites his lips in pure delight and lies his spread palms across Carisi thighs to slightly message them.

“So you’re not gonna suck my dick, ha?”

Barba wets his lips. A sudden excitement rushes with an immense force through his body.

“You think you just gonna sit there and watch me, ha?”

That tone of voice, full of authority, just shoots straight into Barba’s dick.

“At least lick my balls.”

A prickle in his crotch tells him that Barba’s own orgasm is building up simply from that deep voice of Carisi.

So Barba ducks his head and takes Carisi’s balls into his mouth without any preamble.

“Yeah, that’s right.”

Carisi throws his head back. His fist flies over his erection and his breath comes in staccato. Barba palms his own boner through his pants. He briefly considers finishing himself off, but he wants to award his whole attention to watch Carisi.

Next time, they will take their time with this. Barba would get him more naked, maybe finger him if he had lube. But for now, they’re just too excited.

Barba just relishes Carisi’s balls a little before he comes.

The first streaks of cum land on Barba’s forehead. Surprised, he closes his eyes. As a response, Carisi’s left hand grabs into Barba’s hair to pull his head back. When Barba reopens his eyes he finds Carisi slightly bent forward. He wrenches his dick to splash every last drop of cum onto Barba face. On his nose, his collarbones, his cheeks. And Carisi watches closely how he dirties his boyfriend’s face.

“You’re so full of filth, Raf”, Carisi says finally when he slums back into the office chair, feeling completely spent. Something in his posture tells Barba that Carisi is not unhappy about the filth at all. “And you look so fucking beautiful with cum on your face.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, thanks for enjoying, thanks for keep inspiring me. I added the fifth chapter because the ideas are already discussed :)
> 
> Y'all have a nice day!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final fantasy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is a combination of Kat's rightful comment that Raf had promised to always tell Sonny about his "little problem", Bianca's idea that Sonny should whisper filth into Raf's ear while in a police situation and my headcanon that Raf finds Sonny in detective mode extremely sexy. I have also stolen an idea of Bianca, I will add the link to her fic later (or check her out: barbaesparza).
> 
> But no one should be praised more than Rahel who is talking out like all my fics with me which really means the world to me!
> 
> And I don't want this to end! (This is the end though, please don't prompt me anymore.)

“Easy, cowboy!“

Carisi had stood up from his chair and holds two hands in front of him, palms open in a soothing manner.

“Don’t tell me what to do!”

Mr. Palmer, already standing, sticks one index finger into Carisi’s face.

“This is _my_ daughter, and if I don’t want her to testify she won’t!”

“Actually, you can’t t-“

Barba stops short when Carisi sends him a sharp look. The sharpness is not rooted in the fact that his boyfriend had also graduated from law school, but that this is not the moment for citing law.

“Mr. Palmer, I’m afraid it’s not up to you. Would you please sit down so that we-“

“Shut up!”

“We’re just trying to have a calm conversation with your-”

“Fuck you!”

With a sudden swish of his hand Mr. Palmer pushes the table they had been sitting on away. It sways dangerously, but in the end only a few cups fall down. Coffee splashes over the tile floor, porcelain crashes.

Mr. Palmer’s daughter does nothing more than duck her head, Barba has seen this look of hidden horror on too many faces during his career. A look that tells him that Lori is struggling to gain her composure while at the same time she is absolutely used to these outbursts.

Barba had been taken a little more by surprise. He jumps back, the chair he sits on smashes onto the floor. This is when he notices that Carisi takes a step aside, turning his back on Lori and Barba, effectively shielding the both of them away from Mr. Palmer.

_Wait!_

Before Barba can worry about what this means, Mr. Palmer raises his fist. But instead of Carisi’s face, it finds the detective’s collar. Not that Barba likes the look of that any more. He sucks in a breath. His heartbeat goes wild, he basically feels the adrenaline kicking in, but before he can do anything, Carisi has grabbed the man’s hand and turns it onto his back.

A muffled groan escapes Mr. Palmer’s mouth when his face is pushed into the table top.

* * *

A patrol cop pushes the still aggravated Mr. Palmer outside of the door.

When Carisi had clicked the handcuffs around his wrists, he had started screaming at his daughter. _I kill you if you testify!_ Little drops of spittle had landed on the kitchen table.

Barba’s heartbeat had slowed down quickly when he had watched how in control of the situation Carisi had been.

As soon as half a dozen people arrive in the Palmer house’s kitchen and two paramedics start taking care of Lori, Barba lets go of his grip on the daughter’s shoulder and searches for his spot at Carisi’s side.

Without hesitation and not minding that one of the cops is actually standing right in front of them, Barba tiptoes and whispers into his boyfriend’s ear.

“You. Me. Bathroom.”

Carisi’s face only slips for a second. He gives the patrol cop a short nod with the head that tells her to give them a minute.

Carisi’s fingers enclose around Barba’s biceps and gently push the man outside of the kitchen.

To Barba’s dismay though, Carisi stops just right outside of the kitchen door.

“Rafi, there’s police everywhere.”

“So?”

“They have to take our statement.”

Barba pouts. He doesn’t really expect them to fuck or even suck each other off. But Barba is not ashamed to admit that this whole detective attitude is beyond hot. Carisi’s confident manner, the calm strength and not to forget the compassion and clarity with which he had talked to Lori before her father’s outburst makes Barba attracted to him on a whole new level. This is why he feels the need to kiss Carisi at least thoroughly senseless. If even for only thirty seconds.

“Do you need a hug?”

Now Barba pouts even more. He appreciates Carisi’s concern, he really does, but this is not the moment he wants to feel like the damsel he sometimes pretends to be when he wants those strong arms wrapped around him.

Still, he doesn’t resist when Carisi pulls him in for a short kiss.

“Let’s finish this business quickly, okay?”

Barba looks up to him, still sulking, but agrees. “Okay.”

“In the meantime I’ll think about what I will do to you later.”

Before Barba can even look at him to confirm that his boyfriend had actually talked dirty, here in the middle of the hall of some house in the suburbs, Carisi had already walked past him.

Barba takes a moment to listen to his pounding heartbeat, he should be ashamed of how easy it is for this man to arouse him. Only that he’s not. Before he follows Carisi into the kitchen he shakes his head. _Later._

When Barba reenters the kitchen his eyes search for Lori first, finding her surrounded by two paramedics, luckily looking a little less shaken. She’s a strong girl, now with her father out of the way she would testify. That Barba is sure of.

“Mr. Barba, I will take Detective Carisi’s statement. If you don’t mind, my colleague will take yours.”

Barba nods as the middle aged black woman points with her pen to her partner, an eager looking young man that he expects to be a rookie, fresh from the Academy.

But before Barba can follow him, he feels Carisi hot breath tickling in his ear as his boyfriend leans down and whispers in his ear.

“Don’t sway your hips so much while walking, that gives me ideas.”

Barba keeps a straight face of course. He has no other chance under the eyes of two confused looking patrol cops, but his dick twitches all the same.

And he does sway his hips, of course, when he follows the young cop to the other end of the kitchen, knowing that Carisi’s gaze is glued onto his ass and his mind is thinking “slut”.

For his taste, it takes way too long until the patrol cops have taken everyone’s statement about Mr. Palmer’s little outbreak and attempt of witness temptation. And it absolutely doesn’t help that Carisi takes every opportunity to whisper some of his ideas into Barba’s ear. Needless to say they are all filthy and usually include different scenarios of Carisi’s dick in Barba’s mouth.

“Or maybe you wanna watch again”, Carisi suggests finally and Barba is quick to inspect the collection of different colored coffee cups lined up on a shelf in the kitchen.

He knows Carisi is taking sweet pleasure in this cruelty. But they are in public. Barba cannot risk getting a boner.

If they could steal themselves into that bathroom though, just for a few minutes. Barba would shove that cock down his throat and suck until he chokes on it. Just as Carisi had suggested.

Or maybe if a bottle of lube would magically appear from somewhere, Carisi could fuck him fast and hard.

A crooked smile on Carisi’s face tells Barba that his boyfriend knows exactly what he is doing to him.

 _Brazen bastard_.

* * *

“Your place or my place?”

Barba sends Carisi who is sitting behind the wheel a sideward look. He is determined not to show how much Carisi in cop mode is turning him on, yet the heat on his cheeks tells Barba that he is probably doing a poor job.

“Your place is closer.”

Carisi keeps his gaze fixed on the road in front of him and Barba doesn’t like to see that also his hand around the wheel seems relaxed.

Barba knows him to be insatiable and to not be shy about it. The fact that he seems so untouched right now, gives him the impression that maybe Carisi really is not nearly as aroused as Barba is. All those people in that little suburb house probably aren’t doing it for Carisi as much as for him.

He watches Carisi wet his lips, the pink tongue on even pinker flesh and all that Barba can think about is that he needs to punish him for all of this in some way. Maybe he could pretend to suck him again, but make him touch himself instead?

“Did you wear these tight pants on purpose today?”

“What?”

Barba’s gaze shoots up, but Carisi has a calm expression in his face.

“You knew we’d visit that witness together.”

“So?”

“These pants are really tight around your ass, Raf. And you know I like these fucking suspenders on you.”

Barba swallows. He had tried to be subtle, but his boyfriend is a detective after all. And he cannot deny that he loves his perceptiveness.

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“Did you really want me to fuck you in that bathroom?”

Again, not really. But he wouldn’t have needed much convincing.

“You asked me to tell you when I needed help with my… ‘little problem’.”

His angelic face actually doesn’t turn a hair, but Barba sees it in his piercingly blue eyes that he had hit the right nerve.

Carisi would never take that. Ever.

And truly, Carisi turns into a backstreet.

If his dick hadn’t been already half hard this entire time, it is surely bone hard now. Doing something forbidden with his detective, how stupid is that? But Barba cannot help himself but to be absolutely delighted.

It’s a blind alley, they pass the brick walls of the back of some factory and Carisi parks the car gracelessly behind a bush.

“You work for the sex police, we can’t be seen here.”

“You prosecute sex crimes.”

Carisi answers unmoved and slips his hips forward on the car seat and unceremoniously undoes his belt and fly.

Barba’s mouth waters when he sees Carisi long fingers curling around his impressive size and giving it a few lazy strokes.

“Show me yours.”

Barba bites his lips. So he plays brazen today, good. Barba likes that. His clothes already feel too hot on his skin. Though, he forces himself to ooze composure.

With all the patience he can gather, he opens his jacket, making sure that Carisi is able to see those pink suspenders. He loosens his tie before he goes on to pulling out his own cock. Patience indeed is the smaller problem here as he needs all his willpower to not just come in his pants.

Carisi watches him the entire time. Playing loosely with himself. That alone makes Barba’s lips tremble.

“Don’t you think a lonely car parking behind a bush is suspicious?”

Barba holds his dick in his hand and looks over his shoulder. There is absolutely no one around, but he tries to estimate how likely it is that someone could show up and see them.

“It’s a police car.” Carisi shrugs his shoulders.

Arousal shoots through Barba’s veins and his gaze to his boyfriend. It’s a black SUV so the fantasy falls short, but Barba understands what Carisi implies all the same. He hadn’t known he had needed this, but he does. Sex in a police car is suddenly right on top of his priorities.

“Now, you said you had a problem?”

Carisi raises an eyebrow. His lips are plush and pillowy, his blue eyes lusty. This angelic face between all the filth is making Barba’s head swim. Nearly, instinctively the hand around his cock accelerates the speed of his strokes.

“No, let me take care of this.”  
Carisi’s wonderful hand lets go of his own cock and wraps around Barba’s instead. Barba sucks in a sharp breath, remembering that the semi-public set up of the scene doesn’t require him to be quiet and therefore he cries out:

“Fuck!”

“Yeah, that’s what I would like to do right now.”

Maybe he’s too in love or maybe he is right, but everything that this man does feels like magic. There’s a prickle in Barba’s body that starts in his toes, his fingertips and at the top of his head and spreads through his whole body, concentrating in his crotch.

Barba lets his head fall back and closes his eyes.

“Oh my god!”

“I caught you staring at my hands earlier.” Carisi voice sounds rough.

“I love when you touch me.”

If only he would go a little faster, Barba thinks, but doesn’t say because really he has no interest in letting this moment end. He wants to put pause and hold onto it forever, the beautiful warm feeling underneath his skin, his detective boyfriend and the cop car. And even the thrill of parking somewhere behind some brick building facing a huge garbage disposal.

Truth is, they could be anywhere and still what Barba enjoys the most is that it is with Carisi. It’s beyond perfect that this man still learns about new buttons to push to make Barba feel good. It’s liberating. And quite frankly, even more than what he learns about himself Barba loves to learn what his lover likes.

“I love your dick, Raf. Can’t keep my fingers away.”

Barba feels the ghost of a kiss on his cheeks, but he keeps his eyes shut.

“But those tight pants, Raf! You’re such a slut. I know you did this on purpose. Your ass, you know I can’t stop staring. You want me to fuck you. Don’t you?”

And this is the moment he feels these soft lips pressing a feather light kiss onto his cheek. Such a gentle contrast to the eager energy with which his hand is sliding up and down Barba’s cock.

“I always want you.”

“I want you to come.”

Barba is at the point where he feels like what will push him over the edge is Carisi’s demand and his demand only. He needs nothing else. He swallows.

“Sonny, don’t stop.”

“Come, Rafael, come for me.”

And he does. He hadn’t realized that he had built up so much arousal, but when he hears Carisi’s deep voice in his ear it all breaks out.

It feels like the sky above him and the ground underneath him crack open, but it doesn’t matter because Carisi is here. He mumbles sweet endearments into his ear and jerks him through his orgasm until the last drop of cum is spilled out.

“You’re too fucking good at this.”

This is when Barba opens his eyes to detect the beautiful mess in Carisi’s hand. Fuck, he loves dirt on that perfect human being. Nobody blame him, he just loves it.

“It’s you, Rafael, it’s all you.”

A warmth in his chest joins the glow he feels already, but nothing compares to the moment he sees that Carisi takes his dick in his hand.

In the hand that had just jerked him off.

The hand that is still a mess.

And Carisi uses Barba’s cum as slick to jerk himself off.

Barba wets his lips. He doesn’t dare to move, he doesn’t want to destroy any of the beauty of this moment.

“Fuck!”

“Yeah, you like that?”

“You’re perfect, Sonny, you look so fucking sexy like this. I can’t believe this.”

A groan escapes Carisi’s mouth. Barba can observe the built up of his orgasm in the way Carisi’s face contorts, in the way it gradually turns crimson red. Barba just savors every moment of this wonder.

“You’re so good. So good for me.”

Barba surely had loved that shyness when he had first watched Carisi masturbate, but he loved his lover’s new gained confidence about it now even more.

“You should see yourself, how gorgeous you are.”

Barba knows that Carisi loves the praise. And Barba doesn’t need to lie about any of this. With every sentence he says Carisi’s cum slicken hand speeds up more. He jerks his wrist around his dick in near desperation. And suddenly Barba wishes they wouldn’t sit in the narrow car. He wants to kneel in front of him. Get a better angle to watch him closer.

“Is that what you wanted?”

“Sonny, this, you are everything I wanted and more.”

And this is when Carisi comes. Streaks of white semen splash over his hand and Barba’s old back is everything that keeps him from bending over and licking every drop of it.

“Oh god, Rafael!” Carisi finally groans. And Barba feels like he wants to come all over again.

“Sonny!” Barba whispers back. He lies splattered in the car seat and smiles like a fool.

The hand that is not full of the mixture of their cum palms Carisi’s face.

“I can’t believe, you made me jack off in a cop car.”

Barba hadn’t made him do anything and this is not a cop car, but he will take it.

“And I’m afraid, we don't have wet wipes.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks everyone for reading. That someone reads this at all is a blessing to me, but if you leave comments and kudos that would make me even more happy. Happy Pride and happy last day of Eid!

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos are the life of your fanfic writer and very much appreciated. Thank you for reading!


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